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We decided to have a baby and spoke to the other kids about having the final baby of the family. All the kids wanted another baby as much as we did so we decided to go ahead.

Our first attempt worked and we couldn't wait to tell the world.

The day before the first scan Debbie said to me that she thought we were having a girl and she was worried the baby had Edwards' Syndrome. I said don't be silly you can't know that you've not even had a scan yet and anyway things like that don't happen.

The following day we went for the scan and everything seemed fine. The NT levels were just above average but with Debbie's age and the fact that Deb has a Down's syndrome brother we didn't think anything of it.

The 20 week scan came and they told us everything was fine and we were having a healthy baby girl. We were over the moon. All our dreams had come true we were finally having a baby girl together.

At the 24 week scan they told us the baby was small and had a cyst on her brain so we had to go to fetal meds as they were unsure if she had dandy walker variant. We were in bits. At 28 weeks we went to the appointment and they offered us an amniocentesis. We had it and at 30 weeks we had the diagnosis of Trisomy 18. The baby had Edwards' just like Debbie had been dreading.  Their advice was to discontinue the pregnancy as the baby wouldn't survive.

We looked at each other and knew the answer, the baby had fought this long we weren't going to give up on her now. Her kicks were so strong as though they were telling us not to give up because she wasn't.

At 37 weeks the placenta stopped working so they induced Debbie and Lacey-May was born. Screaming and breathing all on her own! We were amazed! We spent the next 12 days in special care baby unit learning how to put a feeding tube down, paediatric life saving and how to monitor her before we came home.  The kids were over the moon to have her home but frightened at the same time. We all were.

We had 6 amazing weeks with Lacey, 42 days of pure love and thousands of precious memories before our gorgeous little princess couldn't fight any more. She only knew love and isn't that something every child should know.

During that time, we made friends that will last a lifetime and an understanding that we will always share with as many as possible.  Our daughter wasn't incompatible with life, she was compatible with love.

Tina, Debs and family

Created: 28/01/2019 18:18

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